The Richard’s Dad and the Cigar Story

                                           The Richard’s Dad and the Cigar story

                                                                     1965

                                       A true story as related by my friend Richard

                                      Witten 12/3/2013 and rewritten 1/29/ 2019

                                                              Howard Yasgar

     This true short and humorous story was related to me in 1965 by one of my good friend, Richard.

     The story Richard told me was about  his dad and I felt that it was so funny that it was worth writing down for posterity.

     When my friend Richard was a teenager he worked part time in his father’s paint manufacturing facility in New York City.

     Because they lived in the suburbs, his dad would drive to work and home every day in their big four door Cadillac.

     At first, whenever Richard rode to work with his father, he sat up front in the passengers seat.

     Now, Richard’s dad smoked a big cigar, but most of the time, it wasn’t lit, he just chewed on it, then, occasionally he would press a button and his driver’s side window would go down. His dad would then turn his head to the left and spit out a big  wad of tobacco juice onto the highway, or onto the car next to them. 

      Every evening as they drove home from work, Richard’s father would be thinking about the paint manufacturing business and not paying much attention to his lousy driving.

       Other drivers would constantly be honking  their horn at him, some would actually drive up next to them screaming obscenities. Lots of people just pulled next to them throwing Richards father a bird. 

       But, Richard’s father was completely oblivious to it all, and he just drove along always chewing on his cigar.

       Richard became so embarrassed regarding his fathers driving, that he started riding in the back seat, he sat in the right rear, where he could slouch down where and no one would see him.

       As his paint manufacturing business grew, relatives started telling Richards father that his Cadillac was an outdated car. 

      They told him that  and people of means now drove Lincolns. They told him to get with the times and trade in his Cadillac for a Lincoln.

      Richard’s father did just that, he traded in his Cadillac for a brand new Lincoln.

      The first evening, as they drove home from work in the new Lincoln, Richard’s dad, like always, was weaving down the highway chewing on his cigar. 

      Richard was in the right rear seat of the new Lincoln all slouched down.

      When Richard’s dad was ready to spit out his tobacco juice, he went to press the button for his driver’s side window to go down. 

      Because the window control buttons were in a different place on the new Lincoln, his dad pressed the wrong button and Richards back seat, right rear window went down.

     His father, sitting in the drivers seat, turned to his left to the left and spit out a big wad of tobacco juice, only the window wasn’t down.